Two Gross Things

 #1

We're doing a fruit fly reproduction experiment.  We started with a banana in a jar, and after about 5 days the banana attracted several fruit flies, so we put some nylon over the top to trap them in.  Nothing happened for a few more days.  Then one day we noticed eggs, which I actually thought was kinda cool.  This morning, though, I woke up, looked in the jar, and discovered that it's full of maggots.  Even just typing that gave me a shiver.  Seriously, it took me about a half hour to get over seeing it.  I could hardly finish my toast.  I put the whole experiment in the laundry/furnace room where we don't have to see it as often...or smell it, because it smells bad, too.  Oh, you know what's cool, though?  The very day the maggots appeared, all the original fruit flies disappeared.  I guess they died.

#2

Tonight at dinner Zach found a hair in his chicken.  I'll be honest; it was probably mine.  That started a family discussion about that sort of thing, and I remembered something I hadn't thought of in years.  In fact, I probably suppressed it.  A long time ago Mike was eating a dessert called Gordon Foods Pistachio Fluff.  In fact, he was eating it right out of the plastic container.  There he was, standing in the kitchen, spooning it in, enjoying it, when suddenly he got a strange look on his face.  He reached into his mouth and pulled out a huge, crescent-shaped toenail clipping.  I'm talking about the kind that would come off an adult male's big toe.  It was the most horrifying thing EVER.  I mean, under what circumstance does that even happen???  I guess somebody at the processing plant was having a terrible day.  Like, "I hate my job!  Eat my toenails, jerks!"  Or maybe somebody just had a lot of time on his hands feet and decided to give himself a pedicure.  Either way, to this day Mike doesn't really like pistachio-flavored stuff anymore.